Heaven's Windows

It's been said before, and I will say it again... it's been a rough start getting back into the swing of things here. After a recent talk with Julie, through the magic world of Skype, I am beginning to regain my hope. Over the past couple of days there has been a theme in conversations all around me. The theme being that of the importance of prayer. I understand the importance, but my practice has been blurred and it's time to get back on track. 

     Today I checked in on a devotional that I casually turn to and it was a good reminder of God's consistency, my inconsistency, and God's determination to win back my heart so that He can give me what He has been storing up. So now it is up to me to prove that I am ready (or getting there). It's my turn to bring my consistency because God is waiting. Patiently waiting for the moment in which Heaven's windows can burst open.

Prove me now (Malachi 3:10).

What is God saying here but this: "My child, I still have windows in Heaven. They are yet in service. The bolts slide as easily as of old. The hinges have not grown rusty. I would rather fling them open, and pour forth, than keep them shut, and hold back. I opened them for Moses, and the sea parted. I opened them for Joshua, and Jordan rolled back. I opened them for Gideon, and hosts fled. I will open them for you--if you will only let Me.

On this side of the windows, Heaven is the same rich storehouse as of old. The fountains and streams still overflow. The treasure rooms are still bursting with gifts. The lack is not on my side. It is on yours. I am waiting. Prove Me now. Fulfill the conditions, on your part. Bring in the tithes. Give Me a chance.
--Selected

From: Streams in the Desert july 27, 2013

Streams in the Desert Devotional

Reality Sets In

It's starting to feel real. But there are still times when I think about where I just came from and it feels as if it was all just a dream. Like as if living in Honduras for two years all happened in a weekend. Now I'm starting life over back in Texas and for one thing it's not easy. Life in Honduras was so simple and I want to continue that here. But how? When everyone around you is in such a rush to get somewhere or to get the next best thing, how can you disregard all of that and take it easy. I've found myself grinding my teeth way too often.
     Coming back I had somewhat of a plan. Now that plan has transformed and my ultimate goal of heading back to Austin seems to have been put off in the distance - a three year distance. Not my ideal dream, but I guess God just doesn't want me there - or at least not yet.
     So here's my plan (in a nutshell and not written in pen). I'm pitching a tent (not literally) in my hometown for a year to complete some psychology classes (hopefully get a teaching job in the meantime). Then, this time next year, head over to Santa Fe, NM where I will begin my Masters degree in Art Therapy and Counseling.
     I always think back to the time when John asked my what I want to do with my life. All I could think of is... help kids not feel hurt. Of course I like art too (or I wouldn't be an art teacher), so if I can pull both of those together then why not? Hence Art Therapy. Fast forward two years of grad school and I will make my way back to the hill country that I love... Austin. Unless God decides otherwise - anything is possible.
     Who knows how crazy the next three years will be. Or what kinds of curveballs will get thrown my way. I can only prepare so much, ya know?

Whatever the case may be I am reminded that God has started a good work in me and that He will bring it to completion. He knows my desires and has my future planned out and I can only trust that He knows best and will walk me through every storm and every sunny day.

But no worries Honduras... I will be back. Maybe even sooner than latter. Te amo.

For now this is home.

The Last Week and the First Week

The last week has come and gone and so has the first week back in Texas. It definitely hasn't been a sweet walk down memory lane, it's been a struggle. It's a very difficult transition and still it hasn't sunk in that I am not returning to Honduras. But God is faithful, and I need to hold onto that.

In the past two weeks I've experienced my first real Honduras soccer game VS Jamaica, cleaned out my classroom, emptied my apartment, packed my two suitcases and carry-on, hung out with my nephew,  visited with family, bought a car, exchanged money, applied for a million jobs, and enjoyed some time at a water park. The weeks have been packed and my energy is on low, but the show must go on!

Here's the last of the photo documentary.

Countdown: 3 Days left: The mural.

Countdown: 2 Days left: Lauren.

Countdown: 1 Day Left: My classroom.

Take off: Jenna sitting with me at the airport. Thanks girl!

The Moments are Fleeting, but His Grace is Sufficient

Lately days have been jam packed with things to do, places to go, people to see. The end is near and we are all feeling it. Actually we're feeling all kinds of things, but my next blog post can tell you all about that. As for now, here's a photo update on the past few days of the photography documentary.

Countdown:12 Days left: The view from my front door. 

Countdown: 11 Days left: Ana's artwork. This girl is so creative, I love it!

Countdown: 9 Days left: My two morning visitors.

Countdown: 10 Days left: Finding little drawings all over the room.

Countdown: 8 Days left: My work schedule. 

Countdown: 7 Days left: A neighborhood soccer field.

Countdown: 6 Days left: My bed that's kept me comfy for 2 years.

Countdown: 5 Days left: This staff.

Countdown: 4 Days left: This girl. Julie. My roommate.  :(

Three more days till take off and I feel like I can barely breath. My reminder is this:

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 

2 Corinthians 12:9

Even though I may feel weak and unsure of what is to come, His grace is sufficient and I can rest in that. This next journey is going to be huge and not easy, but definitely worth it.

2 Weeks Left

Today we celebrated the senior class of 2013 at their baccalaureate. I went with a bad attitude and a headache, but overall it was a beautiful ceremony. This group of kids will be missed, and yet they have so much ahead of them that it's exciting to send them off. I guess as a teacher it comes to a point of a love/hate relationship. You love to have them, but hate to let go. Granted, I only ever really taught a handful of these seniors, I feel that way with this year's 8th grade class. I am going to miss them and all of their big personalities. 

     2 Weeks. One week left of classes and the other to wrap up the classroom and check out. I have no idea how I've made it here. Looking back to the beginning of this adventure still leaves me speechless. Honduras. Of all places God sent me to Honduras and completely changed my heart. I love this place and will miss it dearly. 
     The time has come where there are a lot of "lasts" and although I don't want to say it out loud every time, my heart knows it and it aches. 


So let the countdown continue. Let the transition take it's course. And let God take control. 

Day 30

Day 29: Popcorn Observations

Day 28: Lazy day, room cleaning, rugby in the afternoon.

 

Day 27: Mango season.

Day 26: Amazing students like this one.

Day 25: Trips down the mountain for reading + coffee.

Day 24: School Transportation... Love/Hate relationship.

Day 23: More coffee. Espresso. Yum.

Day 22: Worship Fridays

Day 21: The beautiful flowers here. 

Day 20: The randomness.

Day 19: All of my creative students. So much talent!

Day 18: The messy stuff that art teachers deal with.

Day 17: All of my discarded library book collection.

Day 16: This Girl. My one and only Canadian... Lauren.

Day 15: This guy. Diego and his musical talent.

Day 14: Rainy season.

Day 13: These girls. Jenna and Leslie... always laughter with these two int he mix.

two more weeks... only two more. sigh.

Half Birthday Memories 25.5

Friday Worship Team... Me, Lauren, Susie and Brittany.
You rocked it today!

What a day! Feeling so blessed. First off, I was one of four lucky girls assigned to lead worship for our staff this morning. And it was so awesome. I love how we can pull together all of our talents and just glorify God in unity. That was the beginning of my half birthday memories. It was also my last worship friday for the year (sad face). Today the 7th and 8th graders also had their annual retreat, so to say the least... those who did not register to go were left in class sizes of 10-4. I ended up popping a couple bags of popcorn and had them draw the popcorn as they snacked on the remainder of the pile. And of course you can forget CoolRunnings playing on the big screen. Good times. After school... smoothies (mango, strawberry and pineapple!! yum), chinese food dinner + games with friends made out to be for a great night. I truly am going to miss all of this.
     As a matter of fact, my mind is playing games. But I know what I have to do, and let God do the rest. No matter how scary it may seem to be... He has my back. Thanks to all who made this half birthday a special one (whether you knew it or not)!

One Month Countdown Begins

This is it. One more month to go before I reach Texas soil. Yes, the emotions are on high as I am preparing to leave one place that I have grown to love and head off to the city that had my heart for 5 years of my young adult life. So here goes it. Trying to make the most of this time and love on these kids as best as I can even with all of the end of year frustrations flowing through the blood stream.
     Being as the big day is a month away... I've decided (with the influence of a good friend here) to make a mini photo documentary of this time. So I will begin a 31 day picture documentary today (as it only seems fit).
     This past Friday all of my kids had a sketchbook assignment due. That means I had 180 sketchbooks to flip though. I thought the pile would never end - but low and behold it did. Sometimes it makes me wonder why we, as teachers, assign so much. Because really, we are the ones who get stuck having to assign a grade to everything (or practically everything). Anyways, today's picture starts off with just that... sketchbooks. It's a love hate relationship.

Side note: I will miss their crazy sketches.

The Word on the Street

My 7th graders came up to me today with a rather upset face and asked, "Is it true?". I of course responded with, "Is what true?". Then they proceeded to tell me that the word on the street was that I was not coming back next year. I had to finally admit it to them, and tell them that what they had been hearing was in fact true. That I will be heading back to Texas.
     In class, a couple of them (still 7th graders) insisted that I was going back to Texas for a boyfriend. Oh brother! Even though I repeatedly told them that I was single, they insisted over and over that I was not. One of the boys even said, "How could you not have a boyfriend? Are they crazy? You're a catch!". At that point all I could do is smile and nod my head.
     I wouldn't say that I've been totally calm with the idea of returning to Texas. Lately, I've actually been getting kinda antsy. I'm not worried about the job situation, I'm believing that something will happen in it's timing,  but it's the endless options that are laid out in front of me... those are making me antsy. Which way do I go? Do I pursue a Masters? Do I look more into art therapy? Do I focus on missions work? Do I seek other opportunities in the world (like the one offer in Africa)? Do I start up a small business, or two? So many options, and now's the time. I am single and all I have to worry about is myself right now, so I guess now is the chance to take risks.
     As much as I wish my 7th graders were right, that I was coming home for someone "special" (aka a bf), I am coming home for many others. I am excited to be able to be closer in proximity to family and friends, and who knows... maybe that special someone will walk right on in and join the team. Either way, no matter how the rest of this year plays out, there are a few things that are certain to happen. God will provide a perfect job for this part of my life. I will miss these kids that I get to see everyday. And I will be surrounded by opportunity - opportunity to serve in the community, to lead groups, to make a difference and play a part in things that I had previously never even thought of. And that is exciting!

Now my prayer for tonight is that God would listen to the thoughts of these 7th graders. Listen and run with the idea!  :)   ... but of course, all in God's timing.

My latest painting... from Texas to Honduras. 

Nica Pics!

We didn't take very many pics... but here are a few of the good ones. Small moments captured. 

A beautiful cathedral in the center of Granada.

 

Biking around.... probably my favorite part!

Paradiso... really a paradise. 

Backpacking around Nicaragua.

Monkey on Monkey Island.

Just a monkey and his little red house.  :)

Nicaragua 2013