Friday, April 26, 2013

When God says "No", He means "NO"

At this point in life I can say, thankfully, that I have heard God's voice in dealing with difficult situations. One key thing that I've learned is that when God says No, He means No. Not, "well... maybe. Only if you behave." No. He means No. And it is my job, as his daughter, to listen to that voice and trust that He must have better in store.
     I was recently slapped in the face (not literally) by reality. And I guess this surprise came so that I could re-evaluate my heart - take a heart inventory sort of speak. God again had to remind me of my bright future. If I was only willing to let this go. Truly and Fully hand it over. Not holding onto even one piece.
     So I just want to encourage you. If you are holding onto something that you know is not God's best for you, hand it over. Try with all your might to let it go and allow God to take control. Results might not come in your timing, but that's what's best (and yes, I'm speaking to myself here too).

Friday, April 19, 2013

No Caffeine, High Doctor Bills, and One Night's Rest Later.

Unfortunately the no Coke, coffee, tea, (and now apparently chocolate) restriction continues even after my previous restriction when dealing with laryngitis a couple of weeks ago. Since January, my body has been acting up due to the stress level that I've been under. Now we are one step closer to knowing (or better understanding) the source of the issue. Apparently, with all of the changes and heavy work load that I've been under and on top of that the huge increase of caffeine intake (mostly Coke and coffee to get through the work day) has been causing my heart rate to spike causing an arrhythmia. The consistent chest pain that I've had for two weeks in a row multiple times now have a chance to stop.
     Last night I saw a cardiologist specialist here in Honduras. She was... different. And my experience... horrific. I absolutely hate going to the doctor's office. Absolutely hate it. With my whole off-beat heart hate it. My body shuts down and I panic (there's an issue in that alone). But, thankfully my roommate Julie was there to help walk me through everything. Ugh... I hated it. Well, 45 minutes later and a huge, HUGE, bill after we left with a better understanding of what was happening. Thankfully, there's no blockage in my heart and that it's more of a "chemical reaction" that is causing the irregularities and what not.
     Anyways, we eventually made our way home and I was still processing everything that happened. I knew that I didn't want to go back there (did I mention how expensive it was!!). And I am hoping that these additionally ridiculously expensive pills will help me regulate what's going on and that I can get back to normal beating ASAP. But I was still processing everything.
     In about a week, Julie and I are heading to Nicaragua - a part of me that wants to see where my dad came from, to see the homeland sort of speak. My budget is now close to none because my hospital bill was so huge! Almost one third of my entire month's salary gone in 45 minutes. I think that in the end of last night's experience I was most concerned about the cost of the experience more than the knowledge received because the cost would affect other things (the Nicaragua trip).
     I have less than two months here and the opportunity to get to Nicaragua (with someone who knows what they're doing) is quickly caving in. This is my only chance! Since landing here, that's been one of the opportunities that I've been waiting for and now I hate to think that my budget is close to none.
     Well, to end this long health saga and my travel dilemma, I do believe in a God who provides. He has always come through for me. He knows my wants and my needs (and can tell the difference between the two way better than I can). So here is my trust being put into practice.

You're officially updated on my health and at least on the next few weeks to come. Thanks for reading.  :)

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

On My Mind

I wonder if we ever think about each other at the same time. There are days when someone pops into my head, for whatever reason I don't know, but they make a home in my mind for the day. I know that I've been taught to pray for those who come up in your thoughts, and I follow that, but I can't help but wonder if I pop up in the other person's mind at the same time.
     Imagine. If we could communicate with each other just by thinking of one another. How cool would that be? We could be reassured that the other person is alright. But then again, I guess that's where trusting God comes into play. Over the past few years I've had to really practice trusting God with the lives of some very important people in my life. It's not an easy thing to do when all I want to do is check up on them, but deep down it's just a trust issue. I'm learning though.

My thoughts for the day.

Monday, April 15, 2013

Two More Months and So Much Change.

In exactly two months from today I will be back on Texas soil. First destination is El Paso and I'm well aware of all the changes going on within the city. After two demolitions of important landmarks for the city this past weekend alone, there's a lot to take in when I return. For starters my brother now has a house and my nephew is going to be just over 1 year old! Friends and family are going to be top priority - in the end it's the relationships that count, right?

Two years have flown by. But Glory be to God who has walked with me through all of the adventures, experiences, trials and moments that took my breath away. I will leave with experiences in which I would have never thought possible. I've traveled and experienced a culture that I've only seen on the big screen or in magazines, and yes, the travel bug has a steady bite. I look forward to the next opportunity to see a culture other than my own, but I also look forward to returning to those who I love dearly. I have one more important stop before I head out - Nicaragua. The motherland (sort of speak).

I can't even begin to express how much I have grown up here. The extent of my Spiritual growth is so great and I'm thankful that it's not even close to being over, because I want to always be in search for a deeper relationship with my Savior. There's nothing like the relationship between creation and the Creator.

I'm an art teacher! That in-and-of-its-self still blows my mind away. I get to teach kids how to create! And although the classroom experience is more than just art, it's life. And life can be hard sometimes. I feel honored that God trusted me in the hands of these kids who need that extra bit of encouragement, or that moment in which a life lesson can be learned. I get to teach art. I have been privileged to be able to teach art for almost two years now. How cool is that!? And I will forever be amazed that I've had this opportunity here in Honduras.

So let the countdown begin. God is moving. I'm not worried.

Sunday, April 14, 2013

All Things New

God is at work and we can rest in that. No matter where you are, what you're going through, or how you might feel today, God is at work. Our circumstances have been constructed to fit our lives specifically and they are for a purpose.

The LORD created everything for it's purpose, 
even the wicked for the day of trouble. 
- Proverbs 16:4

There seems to be more and more disturbing things rising up from our culture/generation. Some very horrific things that man is doing to it's own kind. But rest assured, God is at work and His coming is near. Whether events on a global/national level or events happening in your own life are causing you to think negatively, I pray that you will find the peace and rest in God Almighty. I am speaking to myself in this one. Despite all the struggles I may face, I am guarded with a King who will not lead me to destruction but who will continue to bring me through to new perspectives and will bring the victory.

Peace be still,
You are near.
There's no where we can go
that you won't shine redemption's light.

Watch this: Elevation Worship - All Things New

I thought of this on my way down to the city this morning for church and my surroundings just fit in so perfectly with life's circumstances right now. The beauty is in the revelation.

It's a drought.
When the trees stand tall and have no more leaves to give,
and the ground cries out in thirst,
God is at work.
Then, when the timing is perfect, He allows rain to pour.
The rain is absorbed by the brokenness,
pouring over to restore and bring life back.
The rain washes away the old and all things become new.
And in due time life is revived.